Jumia

Sunday, November 25, 2012

I Need To Get Fat

Do we have fat people in the house? Lol, people are praying to be slim oh, but hey we have got a sister here who wants to get fat. Any help? Thanks. Read below;

When will i ever gain my weight back? I've tried Lord knows I've tried. Too skinny for my liking. Everyone thinks my little sister is older than I am. Meanwhile I'm 10yrs older than she is. Yesterday a
neighbour asked me when you enter the university what course will u like to study. Dah...well i don't blame him when my boobs and ass looks like I just reached the age of puberty. So easy for me to loose weight but so hard to gain it back. I need help. Fat people tell me ur secret.

63 comments:

  1. Orobos are blessed. Guys wanna hold something. I love big ass

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hmmmm,I have a big ass but my boo doesn't like me big.

      Delete
    2. Zinnia:

      Na wa! One man's meat is another man's poison.

      Delete
  2. Junks and eating like every 30minutes
    Shoprite bread and butter or egg

    ReplyDelete
  3. Take banana till you go yo!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Ladun's biggest fan25 November, 2012 16:51

    Is Cypron still sold? But it will give you a big tummy. Contraceptive pills as well made me put on weight. Those were the days

    Thank me later.

    Now i'm battling the bulge of motherhood.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yeah Cypron is good BUT it doesn't make u fat! It just makes u very hungry all the time...like u will be eating or nibbling something like every 30 minutes. Depending on how much u eat, u'll put on some flesh. Cypron also makes u sleep...don't take it if ur going out or driving o! The whole idea of Cypron is that it makes u very hungry and sleepy...so when u eat u sleep...that's how u put the weight on.

      Delete
  5. Try flp product

    ReplyDelete
  6. Eat a bowl of ice cream, junk food, plenty sugar,plenty rice everday like deres no tomorrow.n chop a lot of banana juice

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  7. Rolling my eyes @ fat pple tell me ur secret!
    Mtsheew, I was going to give yu a good advice till yu said dat!
    Suck on it, skinny b***h

    ReplyDelete
  8. You wanna Gain Weight??? Just suck or drink ur Boyfriend's Sperm!!! Dat's d secret dear.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ewwwwww. You are disgusting,we are talking about a virgin here mehn

      Delete
    2. Ewwwwww. You are disgusting,we are talking about a virgin here mehn

      Delete
  9. this is my mawu recipe for you, it will cost you ten naira!

    one crate of egg per day.
    two chicken breast per day
    four ltr (one gallon) of coke per day
    twenty bars of chocolate per day
    assorted bread per day
    queens cake, sponge cake, chocolate cake, strawberry cake per day
    enough veggy per day
    enough stew and soup per day
    enough butter enough cream per day
    enough salad per day
    plenty intake of water per day

    try this for 30 days if you are not bigger than a drum (vital statistic 50 50 50), sue me for a refund of ur money.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That is if high cholesterol or high sugar level doesn't kill her first. She will just clog her arteries with fat!

      Delete
    2. Hehehe, I love this. Bottomline, eat all the junk,sweetened drinks, carbohydrate, fatty food u can lay ur hands on. You go fat

      Delete
    3. Lmaooo...ure evil..............

      Delete
    4. OMGosh!!!! This is hilarious!

      Delete
    5. Ten naira ko

      Delete
  10. happy yoruba bunny25 November, 2012 18:03

    i dont think its junk food o, some people v big bones and that brings about their big built and also peace of mind makes some people gan weight, i really want to shed some but its so difficult so v decided to love myself and wear whats suits me, i noticed that when i wear something too small then i look bloated nd constipated, lad pls enjoy ur slim built and dont try junk cause it may give u diabetes or what have u, for d fact that one is slim does not minus you from all these diseases out there now, by the time u have kids maybe, just maybe u may add some flesh again, lastly give urself peace

    ReplyDelete
  11. Start with vitamins,I recently gained 10kg vitamins were my first thing,daily vits and I took some pills to help me eat and I have been earing

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  12. Its true dar skinny people are not very attractive, especially when they are naked. Anyways try eating alot of junks and lot of eggs before yoi know it, you will be like uk size 14 with many admirers.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Another stupid mail. I don't care really as long as there's no marriage mail, sad or happy, for the next 50 years

    ReplyDelete
  14. Go for cosmetic surgery for implants since its boobs and ass you seem to need desperately

    ReplyDelete
  15. You said, "When will i ever gain my weight back"

    Were you fat before? What made you lose weight?

    ReplyDelete
  16. make she go drink meat water (omi eran) and raw egg, she go fat by force

    ReplyDelete
  17. I know I ve been in your shoes. Guess what I tried all sorts but you won't believe what worked , I just started loving my skinny self and stopped listening to people who made me feel bad by saying put on weight. Got married.have three kids now world people want to know my secret on how I am so slim. Ha I got the last laugh

    ReplyDelete
  18. I also want to add weight , am married wt two kids and still I wear size 10 and this get me worried ,ve tried everytin no luck until 2 weeks ago I bought the weight and muscle gain powder from holland and barrat and I mixed it every night at ice cream or add it in milo/ milk ! I also increased my calories intake , and eat a lot of peanut butter , banana, junk foods etc and less than 10 days my size 12 clothes fit me perfectly ! But I still aim to wear 14 so am ny ready to stop now ! Try it

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Nice one. Sorry to ask, is there any increase on your boobs and ass after adding weight becos my husband loves bigger ass, im thinking of adding more weight too.

      Delete
  19. What to eat to gain weight snacks- potato chips, popcorn, cookies, candy, ice cream, cakes.--- fried foods, table sugar, salted/smoked nuts, mint sweets, honey, soft drinks- coke, fanta e.t.c., fruit juice, bread made with white flour, biscuits, high fat milk/yogurt , eat always/whenever you are hungry, but to avoid excess weight:..............drink plenty of water, do exercise once in a week @ least inorder not to burn all the fats, And try to work on your tummy, boobs and butts.........do press up of V-up to avoid big tummy........ Do V-up and use handy weights to build good butts.........do chest exercise to avoid sagging and dropy breast because fats can cause that....I wish you a perfect body build up. Goodluck. Thanks ladun for giving her this opportunity

    ReplyDelete
  20. What to eat to gain weight snacks- potato chips, popcorn, cookies, candy, ice cream, cakes.--- fried foods, table sugar, salted/smoked nuts, mint sweets, honey, soft drinks- coke, fanta e.t.c., fruit juice, bread made with white flour, biscuits, high fat milk/yogurt , eat always/whenever you are hungry, but to avoid excess weight:..............drink plenty of water, do exercise once in a week @ least inorder not to burn all the fats, And try to work on your tummy, boobs and butts.........do press up of V-up to avoid big tummy........ Do V-up and use handy weights to build good butts.........do chest exercise to avoid sagging and dropy breast because fats can cause that....I wish you a perfect body build up. Goodluck. Thanks ladun for giving her this opportunity

    ReplyDelete
  21. Take Postinor 11( Just once). it makes you hungry. then take Ovaltin ( it contains malt and cocoa) with milk. Ensure you eat Puff Puff ( real ones made by the road side, not the one they use for small chops) for breakfast for 2 week straight.

    Im not sure about the breast bit but then you gonna have a BIGGG BUM.


    THANK ME NOW!!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Are you for real??? POSTNOR is for pregnancy prevention!

      Delete
  22. Hahahahahaha @ china berry!!! Nwaiz lick ur armpit.

    ReplyDelete
  23. Lol Anon 17:16 is bitter...

    Re weight gain, my roommate at Uni used to drink one maltina and milk concoction...gross but yeah.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Not gross. Sweetest combination. I had to stop cos of the weight gain. So yeah, one bottle of Maltina mixed with a can of Peak evaporated milk works for weight gain

      Delete
    2. Not gross. Sweetest combination. I had to stop cos of the weight gain. So yeah, one bottle of Maltina mixed with a can of Peak evaporated milk works for weight gain

      Delete
  24. Honey u r just delusional!
    From wat uv said dis is my opinion..
    U look premature, ther4 no boobs and ass!
    All u need is 2 grow boobs and ass and u will look mature! So ur prob is not gaining weight.
    Ur body just probably looks like a 12yrs old boy's own!
    I hav a solution babe...
    If u r in London, go 2 harley st..No 16, ask 4 doc Janice..tell her its from Billie jean!
    Jay will fix u up wif boobs and ass 4 less dan 9k pounds!
    She fixd me up wif 38DD!
    Ull love it!
    Beta still switch body wif Sawala Abeni's daughter or Toolz!
    Billie jean

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Billy Jean are u not tired of being bitter, from blog to blog just insulting people anyhow, u must be a very terrible and bitter person in real life!
      Warning: the WHO says bitter people are more prone to cancer!

      Delete
  25. hahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha u guys are all crazy i have laugh my ass out here that means u all are so fat for u guys to knw all that but wait does rice mk one grow fat?cos i eat rice alot lk 5times in a day.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Yea, rice sure does make pple add weight, cos it contains enof carbonhydrate, .....

      Delete
  26. my dear, try super apeti, feed fine, or cypron....they work well but u will be feeling sleepy all the time ooo....and eat everytime....it works trust me....i use them . i get my sister to send them to me, i live in dublin.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Do you have a job please?
      Smile#

      Delete
  27. my dear, try super apeti, feed fine, or cypron....they work well but u will be feeling sleepy all the time ooo....and eat everytime....it works trust me....i use them . i get my sister to send them to me, i live in dublin.

    ReplyDelete
  28. Ladun's biggest fan25 November, 2012 22:17

    Yes Monica, that's the whole idea. Eat more than normal, sleep and the fat will come in no time.

    ReplyDelete
  29. @Billie Jeans...now I c y readers pick @ u all time, all u do z say one negative thing or d oda...nawa 4u o!

    ReplyDelete
  30. Eat fertilizer

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  31. Supet Apeti. If you don't gain weight after taking it, sue me to my last kobo.

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  32. How can you eat rice 5 times a day

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  33. oh no she didn't.

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  34. Try a big cup of frozen Milk shake daily. Or 3 times daily. You will be bigger than Yokozuna.

    If you are in Naija, I think Munchies sells it

    ReplyDelete
  35. Good luck with getting fat. When you are all fat and shapeless like an amoeba, pls don't come back here asking for boobs and ass.

    ReplyDelete
  36. Try a big cup of frozen Milk shake daily. Or 3 times daily. You will be bigger than Yokozuna.

    If you are in Naija, I think Munchies sells it

    ReplyDelete
  37. My dear don't mind all this people telling you about eating junk food to put on weight.

    You need to increase the number of meals you eat daily, so if you eat 3 times now, increase it to 5 times.

    Make sure your food has enough vegetables,fruits meat/fish/chicken and the carbs like rice, potatoes, bread..... but be careful with sugar

    You'll need to drink enough water and also exercise to increase your strength and prevent your heart from clogging.

    Exercise will help your body absorb enough minerals from what you eat and water will improve digestion.

    I also hear contraceptives helps, but i'll rather you use vitamins to improve your immune system

    Google this program online called Fat VS Skinny, its aired on channel 4 in the UK

    Wish you all the best

    TEE......

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Best and kindest answer.

      Delete
  38. U guys just won't understand. Thinkit is funny but it is actually a serious issue. Having a similar issue but note with d breast and ass thingy.. I just want to add up by 2 sizes cos my bf complains like crazy, e tries to attach it to some medical issue but they have found nothing wrong with me... *deep sigh*.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You sound like you have self esteem issues and that your bf is very stupid. Were you not thin like that when he met you or didn't he see fat girls around? Embrace whatever you are and a real man will appreciate you as you are.

      Delete
  39. Go and drink Maawu.

    ReplyDelete