Dangote

Monday, November 26, 2012

I'm A Single Mother Who Is ready To Mingle, But the Right Guys Are Not Coming

Hi Ladun,

I am a single mum, who has been separated for two years( not my wish though). I tried all I could to keep the marriage despite being emotional and  mentally traumatised ,and physically abused, but I had to leave when my life and that of my child was at stake.

I hear people talk about how they cheat on their husbands and it amazes me because its a very difficult thing for me to do,  it takes a lot of guts I must say(Not judging here), if it was that my husband was just cheating alone I would have stayed.


I have been celibate, and not been in any relationship for the past two years, because most people that comes are young  single guys and married men, and I just feel its not right to date another woman's husband. I didn't even do that as a single before getting married, not trying to be a saint here, afterall I didn't marry a virgin and people who do so, have their reasons.As for the single guys abeg make them go find single babes like them leave after one like me alone, atimes I wonder why I attract them, maybe because I don't look like someone that has dropped one sha.

For me I will be more comfortable with Single dads, divorcee(must know the cause of the divorce, so I no go from fry pan enter fire), and widowers, but they are not coming. Despite the fact that the population of these set is few compared to married men and single guys without kids but not even one in the past two years.

I am beginning to get worried and lonely, some friends are already advising I date a married man as against my wish, as it will be difficult to meet this category of people.

Is there any chance that I will meet anybody from this category ?I am human abeg and my body no be wood oooo!

For those who are happily married, I pray things don't ever turn the way round.

For those who have troubled marriages, Believe things can still work out.

For people like me, who have tried all to the extent that family and friends advised you  leave for your own good, it can only get better.

For the singles, marriage is a beautiful thing, if you get it right, although it comes with different challenges.


52 comments:

  1. My first question to you is, are you born again? if you are not, then it time you turn ur life back 2 Christ JESUS. secondly, Make Jesus ur focus, serve him with sincerity, He will not leave you nor forsake you.

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    Replies
    1. Wdf?? Must you impose religion on everyone?

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    2. Yes the anon can

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    3. Thank u olooooo. Must religion be everything

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  2. If a single guy is interested in you, why not go 4 him? U already have a mindset of the type of guy that u r looking for and that is wrong. One thing I have always believed is that you don't choose who u fall in love with.
    I have friends that were single mum before getting married to single guys.
    Sweetie u don't have to limit yourself. Pray n I hope u get directions

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  3. We will set up a committee for that...
    Concerned Citizen

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  4. Where r u based? What country?

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  5. Happy Yoruba bunny26 November, 2012 20:05

    D single guys wl be ur best bet, the married ones r not d best, d widowers I don't kow where u'll get them as I don't pray for Another woman to die to take over her home, ts been known that single guys nowadays pick after one as wives, to some guys it really does not matter, while ts a big deal to some, a single guy that can date u will obviously marry you if he has to, keep ur mind open - u shd count urself lucky they r even coming, d divorcee sure has even more responsibilities to his kids and other babes outside, who knows what crashed his marriage in the 1st place, u'll definitely not enjoy d marriage cause d ex wife may not even give him peace and u'll not be an excemption from d stress

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  6. Oponu ladun didirin liadi..I hate u. U go see. 40% of those curses nah u get am no worry. Dey use pple comment clean yansh. Nonsense girl *spits*

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    Replies
    1. You hate her? I feel bad for you.

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  7. Stop dulling urself, single young men are thr best

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  8. hummmmmm single men marry girls with after one. You wont be the first or the last so why dont u keep an open mind.

    Kudos for not following married men

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  9. Give me her number. Hope she no mind a lesbian partner as she no ready date single guys

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    Replies
    1. fool, u better stay away 4rm her n carry ur yoke alone

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  10. Online dating stuff should help...If your in naija I dunno man, try ehh I dunno try asking round

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  11. what is this lady on about.??.the gist is all over the place mehn

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  12. Pscheeeeew. You are not ready to date again. Imagine the foolish criteria you set for an ordinary date

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  13. I DINT GET WHYYOU ARE SENDING THIS TO LADUN

    IS IT THAT YOU WANT US TO SEND YOU NUMBERS OF THE DIVORCEES, OLDER BUT SINGLE GUYS WE KNOW?????


    SORRY NO CAN DO...JUST DO WHAT IS RIGHT, CONTINUE TO KEEP YOUR HANDS CLEAN AND YOU WOULD BE REWARDED WITH YOUR OWN MAN

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  14. Being celibate is obviously ur decision cos if ur body no b firewood like u said, u wud hav had sex 10000000times in d past 2yrs!
    Must u marry a person u fuck?
    Haven't u heard of 'sexual partners'?
    Y don't u UNwooden ur body by enjoying sex wif a cute single guy?
    Afterall it musnt b serious or lead 2 marriage!
    Dey der dey suffer ur poor body..
    I'm sure u r all rusty down der!
    *kmt*
    Billie jean

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    Replies
    1. Billie jean,
      Do u always have to be so mean? You are always angry men!!!

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  15. The right guys are not coming??? Haba! Pls contact me and see what true love and care really means. A single guy. if you are serious contact me @mattlawo. cheers!

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    Replies
    1. Nonsense. U look too hungry for me. *spits*

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    2. Anon 23.01 Spitter, are you the writer or a random girl looking for a husband on Ladun? U actually went to check out @mattlawo?

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  16. Your new husband26 November, 2012 21:15

    I would love to chat with you. You are one in a million and have my respect already. Please create a pseudo email account where you can be contacted.

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  17. @ IVORY CHI, YOU ARE WICKETTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT, lmao,,,,,,, miss worried date a single guy, u don't have a problem oo cos I don't know why you sent this to ladun, I even thought il see that NO MAN was toasting you,,,,, ladun ladun ladun, Abeg pass the mic

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  18. is this now a dating site? poor and how low this farce is sinking

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    Replies
    1. R u minding the stupid ladun. I wish I could bash her head in right now.

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    2. Mato...abeg go chop better food. You luk lyk who dey hungry. Frm ur avi am certain u cant go beyond 2minutes wit ur small peke. Go work on urself & come back. Pele
      ....Concern brother

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  19. Do not be myopic. Give the single guys a chance. you are already condemning yourself and assuming that you are not worthy of a man without a kid. Dear, you are.

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  20. pardon me, i did not read through but "celibate for more than two years" caught my eyes. you must be tight. i will highly recommend you for any interested divorcée/single/widower.

    on a serious level, dont give up, keep search and maitain a happy demeanor. all the best.

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  21. And you've an obvious problem with single men? Sorry lady you will be alone a long ass time. Single dads/divorcee are harder to have serious relationship with just FYI.

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  22. There is no big deal in being celibate mine is over four years and will be five years next april is all about integrity. Am also a single mum of two based abroad but am also in the same situation waiting on God's time which is the perfect timing and I believe he will not leave you or forsake you. In my case if it comes all well and good if not am not gonna force it. Just keep hope alife it is well with you in Jesus name.The bible says it is better to marry than to burn if you cannot continue with being celibate please don't mess your body up just find someone that wants to settle down with you once beaten twice smart.

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  23. Single guys would do for u ma'am. Just make sure they are not younger than U. U don't wanna date a divorced guy,comes with plenty baggage...

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  24. who ever you are dear, i feel your pain as well, i have quite a few divorcee male friends, i am also married, i ave quite a number of responsible ones who i try to counsell from time to time and are willing to change. i want to hook you up, i cannot drop my pin here cos i dont want strange people adding me, how can i reach you, i pray you see my post,so you can get back to me, ladun please kindly help send my email; adress to her so she can contact me personally, you cant konw what it will end up like but i sure wish you the best, (phyl.adams@ymail.com) is my email adrss, when you contact me and show evidence your the on or confirmed by ladun, i will add you on bbm and then the hook up process starts, but i need ladun to help out reaching out to you cos pple can be funny someone can claim to be you and trying to catch fun, so pls ladun, i believe ur blog is a lot more help ful, in the sense of advice, challenges, and a few comments that people post as well, help make a positive impact, i will mail u as well

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  25. I too has been celibate for 8 yrs.

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  26. Seriously? What's with all the bile nah? Haba carry your garbage somewhere else Anon Ladun hater.

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  27. My dear, ur not yet tired of being single, wen ur really tired nobody will tell u before u stop being so picky. whats wrong with dating a single guy? if he's ready to accept u, ur past and ur child kini bg deal? sit there and be looking for someone else's rejects. anyway i guess what they say is true, like attracts like. when the single guys come, please direct them to me. thanks.

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  28. My uncle has bin a single dad for 15 yrs and he is celibate too. Hit me up at celibatesanonymous@hormail.com

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    Replies
    1. lol @ celibatesanonymous@hormail.com you bad die!

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    2. talk well now jjc, the @ sign is ur friend

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    3. @ 10:25 the @ sign is ur friend, let us know whom you are refering to, am def not an ode, all your family must be living in dopemu!

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  29. i know one thing for sure billie jean i really av neva understood y ud rather abuse ppl wen u wana give advices its best u dont talk n let ppl who have words in their mouths speak.furthermore my dear if uv been celibate for years id advice u dont remain picky stay wit whoeva wnts to b wit u n give it a chance plus there are loads of guys out there willing to give u a gud fuck if u can build friendship wit em nt jux any tom dick or harry i mean.u can be hapi again if u believe

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    Replies
    1. Your last line is so true

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  30. 231E8616. I jst need to chat wiv U.

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  31. My dear, i am in same boat with you. A single mother of one . But seriously it depends on what you want, what you experienced in your previous commitment, and your passion. If you stil want to marry, be very careful on the type of man to have in. It could be a single guy, divorcee or a widower. As for me, i need a widower , not an occult man that killed the wife. Hahaha. In this my state now, i prefer a widower to divorcee guy. Be patient, you wil get your type of guy.

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