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Friday, August 10, 2018

Couple Who Post Their S*x Videos Online Say It's To Help People & Has Made Them Stronger

A couple who share videos of themselves having sex say the experience has made their relationship stronger.

Fernanda Vasconcelos and Walter Gutierrez have built an online following of fans on a website where lovers can post clips of "real-world" sex.

They say the user-generated video-sharing platform, Make Love Not Porn, fights all the misconceptions of the typical X-rated clips all over the internet.

The couple have told how the experience has helped to get them through personal trauma and bring them closer together.

Walter said: “It’s to show real people having real-world sex and fighting all the misconceptions that come from porn.”

Fernanda, who is known online as Efi, added: “It’s like this sex utopia where people don’t have taboos or boundaries or walls in front of them. It’s just real people having fun, being themselves, and just making the most of it.

“I like to turn to the camera now and then between the filming to make the ones that end up watching the videos involved in it.

“We even plan it like, ‘Oh, maybe you can put on these and we can do it on the sofa or we can make it like a really cool spot on the floor, or the window'."

The couple, from Mexico City, have been together 11 years, and while friends and bosses know about their online exploits, they are yet to reveal it to their religious parents.

For now, they say sharing their sex lives has helped them in powerful ways, most notably by helping Efi 'reclaim her sexuality' after being sexually assaulted during a gynaecologist visit.

She said: “I was so ashamed and I felt like my body didn’t have value after that. I started crying when we were having sex because I was trying to heal myself. I didn’t tell anyone.”

Efi eventually told Walter, who had noticed something was terribly wrong, about her horrific experience.

He said: “It was hard to really know how to react to that situation. I was thinking a lot of things ranging from finding the guy to going to the authorities.

“But in Mexico the justice system simply doesn’t work in favour of the victims. It’s easier here in Mexico to blame the victim.

“So there wasn’t really much we could do. I really tried to do my best. I just tried to be there.”

In 2013, Walter came across Make Love Not Porn after its founder and CEO, Cindy Gallop, gave a TED Talk introducing the platform.

Something about the prospect of using the website resonated with Efi, who said she hated watching porn after her assault, due to it being “all about domination and submitting women to something.”

She said: “Finding Make Love Not Porn made me think it could help other women to find out what sex is really about.

“At first, I had my doubts because of course I didn’t know if I wanted to show my body to someone besides Walter.

“But we made a video and submitted it and it had a really good response. I just instantly felt a little better about myself and about everything – about sex, about us.”

Cindy spent 30 years in the advertising industry before creating Make Love Not Porn, and envisions her platform as a tool to help society think differently about sex.

She started the site in 2009 after noticing that the younger men she dated - often in their 20s - had sexual expectations heavily influenced by the easy availability of hard core pornography.

She said: “I realised I was experiencing what happens when two things converge - when total access to hardcore porn online meet our society’s equally total reluctance to talk honestly and openly about sex.

“We are not porn. We are not amateur. We are building a whole new category on the internet that has never previously existed: social sex.”

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