Enjoy this, it was sent to me by a friend: A call from a 419 guy with caller ID hidden:


Mr. 419: Hello, how are you?

Ayo: Fine. Please, who am I speaking with?

 Mr. 419:Haba, don’t you remember me?  Who do you know in UK that
could be calling?

(Sensing a scam, I threw in a trap…)

Ayo: Johnson!  Is that you?  (meanwhile, I don’t know any Johnson in UK .)

(Thinking it’s a break, he swallows the bait)

Mr. 419 : Of course, this is Johnson!  How come you didn’t recognise
my voice initially?

(Certain it’s a scam, I decided to punish him verbally and
financially.  I had the time that morning so I was going to assist him
waste his call credit.)

Ayo: Jooooooohnson! Kai! Omo buruku gbaa ni o! (You are a specially
bad boy)  Your father died, you didn’t so much as show up or send a
note.  Omo a se iru e fun e! (Your children will repay you with such).
 Didn’t you hear about his demise?  He was so bitter and full of
original curses for you.

Mr. 419: (Obviously subdued)  I didn’t hear. I would have come.

Ayo:  Too bad.  You heard your mama is leprous too?  You didn’t hear
about that, abi?

Mr. 419: (Now uncomfortable) No, I didn’t hear.

Ayo: (Enjoying myself thoroughly).  Too bad.  Is your wife that
foolish too?  Not even a word from her after you folks married without
our blessings?  If the husband is not wise, is the wife lame-witted

Mr. 419: She’s fine.   I’m certain she’ll get across to you. There’s an issue…

(..breaking in before he begins his story)

Ayo: Johnson, O se mi o: (you offended me).  I sent you money to buy
me a car and you just disappeared.  When am I having my money back?
You want me to curse you too like your father did?  I don’t have his
kind of patience I’m sure you know.  I won’t wait that long before I
give you what you deserve.

Mr. 419:  (Grunted).  This issue is important…

Ayo: Shut up!!! When are you sending money home?  Haba! We sent you to
school, clothed you and sent you abroad…  Are you now a 419?
Stealing from me your friend too. Your father was right to curse
you… And you can’t escape it if you continue like this.  It’s not a

Mr. 419:  I’ll repay you.

After about 15 minutes of moves and countermoves…I owned up.

Ayo: See Mr. 419, I don’t know any Johnson in UK .  I just needed to
teach you a lesson.  Go get a proper job.

Mr. 419: Were! Oloriburuku! Lo ti n sepe fun mi lat’aaro! (Madman, and
you’ve been cursing me since morning!)


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