Friday, October 10, 2014

I’m Confused! I Don’t Know Who To Pick... LL Female Reader Writes

Dear Ladun,

I need a little advice from your blog readers. I am a young lady of 28 years, working and very comfortable. I met my boyfriend, in January. Initially, i didnt like him because he wasn’t my regular type of guy that i like to date, but as time went by, the likeness kicked in and i became fond of him and him of me.

We were always together. Parties, weddings, friends’ houses, you will always see us together. Then my boyfriend travelled out in May for his masters, and wants to settle down once he is done. We communicate alot, we bb chat, talk on the phone and skype almost everyday (sometimes twice a day).


I met this other guy in July and he is soooo into me. Spoils me silly and stuff. He's introduced me to his family,(his mum calls me sometimes)initially i told him i had a bf and he was like that's none of his business that he is gonna win me over no matter what. We go to family functions etc.

I love my boyfriend soooo much that I miss him all the time, but at the same time am beginning to like this other dude, he is a nice and humble guy and i dont wanna hurt him. Sometimes i try to bring up my boyfriend to remind him and he takes offense in it. He is talking about settling down, i know am not growing any younger but at the same time i am not desperate just because my friends are getting married doesn't mean i should rush into it, Gods time is the best.

Just last week he was talking about planning an xmas vacation for both of us, and my boyfriend is coming back to the country for the xmas break. I don’t know how to tell him not to because like i said if i bring up my boyfriend he is gonna freak. Am thinking of ending it with this new guy but at the same time i dont wanna hurt him....(he is tooooooooo niceeeeeeee).


What should I do now?

65 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. I totally agree..

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    2. barmmie creamie11 October, 2014 01:41

      100 percent,if u claim to love someone,u won't cheat on dem,how does she do it?loving 2 guys at d same time huh?u got urself into dis mess,never have 2bfs,jst 1 who adores and makes u feel special,and if d first guy is doing all that,why lead anoda guy on?some women are never satisfied sha,u never loved ur first bf jare becos if u do,d love will be too much for u to jst ignore and jumping into anoda man's hand!!!i pray u don't lose both of dem sha,pls explain to d second guy that u have a bf and be firm abt it,u're already 28 stp playing around and get serious.

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  2. Go and jump into the river!

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  3. How r u sure d guy abroad does not have any babe over there. Play your cards well. I will advise you to stick to both of them for the main time and dnt say anything about your bf to the new guy again. Just because a guy introduce you to his family does not mean he is serious, some of them are time waster. Dnt let anyone tell you the devil you know is better dan d angel u just met. Dats bullshit.

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  4. These hoes aint loyal

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  5. Follow ur mind ... #in face voice#

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  6. You want to eat your cake and still have it. If care isn't taken, you might lose both of them. A word is enough for the wise.

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  7. Decide on time or else you might lose both of them. You can't eat your cake and still have it.

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  8. If u don't want to hurt him, it means u wanna hurt ur boyfi, make a decision(follow ur heart); u knw who's truly right for yhu#luv a man dat loves GOD

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  9. Silly child...you already entertained the second guy,why are you afraid of him freaking out if from inception he is aware of your boyfriend..Please tell yourself the truth.

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  10. I would say ,stick with your boyfriend...but then the Ultimate,Ask God for direction, ask him to give a sign.

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  11. Make una dey learn to use una head oooo, no be anything una goo dey ask lib readers metcheew. DERA MI

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  12. Ask God for the right person, go on your kneel

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  13. ThatAnonymousChic10 October, 2014 13:51

    Nobody can tell you what to do. You should however stop stringing two guys along like that because people always end up getting hurt that way. So sit down, think hard and make up your own damn mind!

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  14. Hmmmm!u know what u want,young lady but pls,try to carry ur parents along.

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  15. Well its obvious u don't know wot u want yet....enjoy urself while u're at it, wen ur 34 and know wot u want , no one will tell u what to do.....trust me

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  16. If you can be this unfaithful to your boyfriend, that means when you are married you will be so unfaithful to your husband.

    How I wish I have your boyfriend' email so that I can advise him to DUMP your ass.

    Your bf' case is exactly like my case and that was the decision I took with no regret whatsoever.

    Why can't these girls be faithful for once. The moment, you are not around, they lashes on to any one around them.

    Crazy bunch of hoes.

    How are we sure, when your boyfriend comes back, you are not going to give him STD?

    This is how "runs" start. The moment you marry, you are most likely to be doing "runs".

    I pity the sucker that you will end up with because this other guy is just screwing you and using you to pass time.

    Don't be deceived by the fact that he has introduced you to his parents.
    Uncountable numbers of girls who were introduced like you still ended up being dumped.
    If you don't believe this, you can ask around.

    Trust me, his mother or at least one member of his family is fully aware that if you can be so unfaithful to your boyfriend who is abroad, you can equally be unfaithful to one of their own if the situation warrants it.

    Most mums are not foolish as they always think deep and I can assure you of this fact.

    olu@atlanta.

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    Replies
    1. olu i dnt mind you calling me names bt this is a serious issue. if you have experienced this b4, i dont blame you bt my dear wats the guarantee that the one in the UK will come bck and still wanna marry her? men can b unpredictable. Am not in SUPPORT of wat she is doing but then tink abt how UNRELIABLE we humans can b some times.... we are all mortal nobody is above mistake. AS for You madam poster, Pls seek for God's direction cos he is the only one who can direct you on whom to choose. Thank you.

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  17. Hey U didnt post that linda ikeji is back. smh

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    Replies
    1. U blind Abi? Continue shaking ur dull head till it falls off!!

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  18. My dear it is in your capacity to make the decision as it is you life. I never ends well when you gamble so if you say you love your Boyfriend then let Boyfriend no 2 go. If you did not tell him you had a boyfriend it would have being a different case.

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  19. you cant eat your cake and have it. if you dont want to loose on both ends, its better you stick to your boyfriend and build your world around him. you cant date every nice guy dt comes your way on the platform that you dont want to hurt him. think wisely

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  20. Eat ur cake n still have it na...abi which silly advice u dey look for again?...continue to dey fuck dem both..olojukokoro see her mouth like 'hespoils me silly,he's so niiiice'..oshisco

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  21. Ms Poster no matter d advice u get from people u will stil end up doing what's in ur mind..so d best thing is jst follow your heart n do that which will give u internal peace cos that's what matters..u alone knws where ur happiness lies so follow it..from ur narrative u ar into both guys n u dnt wanna let any go bt remember u can't eat ur cake n have it...choose wisely!

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  22. ur a thief as ur not contented with wat u have showing interest in other sweet things and a self centered person. u deserve all the hurt because at the end of the day u would loose both and stay unmarried for a longer time.

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  23. My advise can only be a solution
    Kindly pass me one of them. *Same Age as you* your kind gesture will greatly be appreciated. N:B if you need me to mail you just drop an hint and will gladly do. Kisses in advance

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  24. Most often than not, whenever we have something serious going on some distractions may come along but you make the mistake of been carried away, you'll realise that lateron that they are not real. so hold tight to your boyfriend

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  25. Asewo no be work

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  26. U're jus a confused she goat! Dnt worry u will soon meet de 3rd guy dat will be extra ordinary soooo nice Greedy Bofoon.

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  27. U're jus a confused she goat! Dnt worry u will soon meet de 3rd guy dat will be extra ordinary soooo nice,Greedy Bofoon.

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  28. MEHN!!!!!!!!!!........... I envy you. But really is a long dark road that you do not know what lies ahead. I'll advice that sit and ask yourself, wht do you want in ur husband, who has des qualities and if you are a xtain, i blif so much in asking God. But rait now, you are indulging in a dangerous way of the other guy around, you are bound to get carried away. Keep away from him to have a clear head to think.

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  29. HE ALREADY KNOWS YOU HAVE A BOY FRIEND THAT IS WHY HE IS TOOOOOOOOOOOO NICEEEEEEEEEE! LETS SEE IF HE WILL BE TOOOOOOOOOO NICEEEEEEEEEEEE WHEN YOU DUMP YOUR OTHER GUY FOR HIM! YEYE

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  30. So the summary of this piece is that you're a cheat who wants to eat her cake and have it and who's probably going to get an infection from one guy and pass it to another. Nice.

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  31. Dump the new guy . There is still such a thing as INTEGRITY .

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  32. Just one advice .. What you see is what's real .. Mind you I'm a guy

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  33. My dear, the best thing is to wait for ur bf, so far you guys still gets in touch and it is very constant then I believe he will definitely be your best pal.that you knw the new guys mum does nt mean he can't dump u anytime for another girl. So be wise (an old devil is better than a new angel)

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  34. I am just 23,but from my own little understanding,I think you shouldn't have dated the second guy in the first place if you wanted to be sincere,but you know sumtimes we ladies think the best option to not get hurt is dating two or three guys @ a go,without considering that later we might have to choose who to settle down with and then the confusion comes in,the deed has already been done,but what I think you should do is pray first,ask God for forgiveness,and pray he leads you through,then think deeply who you truly loves and loves you too,forget about material tins,marriage is a lifetym journey,I pray the lord sees you through!!! LauhrexRaj

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  35. All of u feeling bad for linda ikeji, u see how conniving, and cunning she is?? Still can't believe she put out that private chat and tried to divert people's attention from the main issue (plagiarism) to some nonsense bullshit just to save face...porous minded folks will eat it up like the usual bs she feeds them. I used to be indifferent about her but what she did today really disgusted me. That chat purely showed linda ignoring a guy who helped make her....she only excitedly responded to him recently because she was in deep shit and was hoping that the guy will save her ass. Now she's accusing him of obsession, but didn't do so when he was helping her build her brand. Then she claimed she never saw his messages, but she never tried herself to reach out to a guy that helped her soo much either? This guy felt so bad in the chat for outing her even tho he had to because linda ignored him and on top of that was also stealing his materials...and kept ignoring him even after he tried many times to reach out...who would'nt react the same. Whomever falls for this woman's manipulative tactics has uburu okuko i swear. Not surprised tho, this is the same way fake pastors and politicians control u people in naija...they know the right buttons to push on u gullible folks! Sickening.

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    Replies
    1. Bla bla bla you seem like you're in pain. Get some paracetamol.

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    2. So true Prof X, she is in serious pain. Well darling, she's back....get over it!!!! Move on with your life and pray for a Range Rover too. Green Ogre.

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    3. Anon 3:44 I said the exact same thing. She's hella transparent

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  36. Link a sister up a beg. ...... There is love in sharing.....lol. If u r sure of ur bf, then go ahead and turn him down politely else hold unto him. ... meanwhile a lot can happen in two months so bae chillax n enjoy d treat. ...*hope u ain't kpanshing him oo*

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  37. Jst send me ur main BF no and all problem wl b settled. U cannot eat ur cake nd av dem girl.

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  38. oleee, olojukokoro nie ....

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  39. young lady this by no means an insult but you are CONFUSED!!!! you clearly do not know what you want. but anyways you need to be honest with yourself, make a decision and save everyone the heartache especially yourself. goodluck.

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  40. u shouldnt av allowed anoda guy in d first place into your life wen u know you av som1 u luv....

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  41. At 28?u still don't know what u want from life.sorry.just use your head!

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  42. At 28?u still don't know what u want from life.sorry.just use your head!

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  43. you are a FOOL. ole olodo

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  44. The women abusing her are obviously ugly and envious. Girl, think like a man. Hot stuves... Xx

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  45. How sweet. I was in this position myself like 2years ago so I know how it can be. But ultimately you have to decide. You are in a committed relationship and you should not commit to more than one person at a time. If you were married, you wouldn't be here asking which to choose. Unless you have good reason to break up with your boyfriend, stick with him, there will always be nice guys but agreement is agreement.

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  46. You see life at 28 no boy not to talk of man in sight.please don't b carried away by material things..pray God makes all things beautiful in his time

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  47. At 28 u call urself young marriage wise......u obviously dnt know wat u want den.....babe as for me oo......I ld say d devil u know is beta d devil u jst met dah is forming angel for u...m.bcos I wldnt exactly call d oda guy an angel.....babes stick to ur day 1nigga..... Sefini

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  48. A cat chasing 2 rats, catches none

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  49. Stick to ur bf, the devil u know is better than the angel u dont know

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  50. When people lash out @ females like this other people call it hate or use some funny ass words to describe it.Even tho I know dis story is fiction n not real dis is a normal trend common amongst certain females but if truely a 28 year old female cannot tell right from wrong then she'll almost never get it right unless she does d right thing. 80 percent of d females in lagos r whores whether she de work for bank,stand for road or na blogger .YoLo is simply d code they live by u can't tell em NOTHING *in kanye's voice* I just pity so many dumb ass dudes fooling emselves thinking they have some GF somewhere. Humans in general hardly go for what they need,they usually go for what they want forgetting its not what they need. My advice to men u can never have a GF unless she's ur Wife .Think deep am sure u'd understand. As for females quit opening your legs easily maybe these men would reduce cheating.

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  51. Ladun, is ur blog extension of hints magazine? Get someone that can tell good stories! Na wah oo. Or stop the story telling n put ur self at a level. Gosh! So childish. O problem if don't post as far as u ve read it. Am being sincere.

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  52. All the people that commented is not fair. If the boy travelled for his masters he should have put a finger on her hands before he left.

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  53. What advice do u want, Your bored so messing around its understandable, the guy knows you have a man so whats the heartbreak. Next!

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